What a beautiful read Karen, on how finding that connection and home within ourselves is the most wonderful experience, and something we are constantly learning to get more close to as life goes by.
“I’d chosen a different home, but I couldn’t find home within myself” — that’s the line the whole piece turns on. And what strikes me is that losing the geographical anchor wasn’t a detour from the inner work, it was what forced it. As long as there’s an external thing to rearrange, we’ll rearrange it instead of turning inward.
I’ve moved twenty-four times, and for a long stretch I thought each new place would be the one that finally settled me. It took an embarrassing number of those moves to understand that home was never going to arrive in the next postcode — that the unsettled feeling boarded every van with me. The moves weren’t wasted, though. They were the slow lesson that the anchor I kept looking for outside had to be built somewhere I couldn’t pack.
The boat didn’t fail to fix you — it took away the last place left to hide. Five years to find home in your own skin isn’t slow. That’s just how long it takes.🫶🏻
That's so interesting.. thank you for reading and for your thoughtful comments. My whole world started collapsing a couple of years before we sold the house as my mum became ill and died suddenly, but I hadn't thought in terms of when there's something/s external to rearrange, we'll use anything as an avoidance tactic. That's certainly true of me and I called my Substack Saved By Grace as moving onto the boat and everything that came with it is changing my patterns. Grateful for your comments 🤍
I recognise that ponderment, is the unsteadiness within to do with the flow of nomadic boating? For me moving aboard six years ago one of the appeals was not having to sit still - but when you have to go, it stirs up the reflection doesn't it? Great your story is resonating with people 💚
For me, it's been mostly about not being centred in myself and as I'm being truer to who I am and being less concerned about how I'm perceived by others, I feel much more tethered. I feel much happier living a nomadic life when I feel secure within...if that makes sense!
This is lovely! I think for me, feeling untethered is a neurological state, like waking, like sleeping like being calm or being stressed! I guess it's a state of being easily triggered by having no anchor, no internal compass. My last three weeks have required me to navigate being surrounded by people like this. The problem is it's catching. It's a massive act of self mastery to not respond "in kind," but rather, to be kind anyway!
It must take a lot of energy not to respond in kind to those around you and it must be tiring. Thank you so much for reading and for your thoughtful comments.
I feel this has been coming up as a requirement since about 2022! We are all being called to respond differently. I wish you a great enjoyment of your new situation! Water is a medium that fills any gap exactly, effortlessly! 🌟
Hi Alexander, that's something my husband always wanted to do, buy we compromised with a narrow boat. We've recently been to the Outer Hebrides, so I imagine you're seeing some beautiful scenery and landscapes every day. Looking forward to reading about your journey and life on the water!
I also found your Substack through that post, and it feels like providence, there are so many parallels in our journeys despite the differences. I got a little sailing boat named Kismet, and sailed around Scotland.
I so relate to both feeling untethered, but then connecting with myself through the uncertainty. I think in addition to being constantly on the move, there is also a quality to water and nature that connects you with yourself.
I am truly grateful to be here, Karen. Your openness to being inspired by others—and sharing your own truths so authentically—is exactly why so many new readers are finding their way to you!
The journey to finding a place of your own within, no longer contingent on where you happen to be located geographically is a worthwhile trek. I have made the journey and also celebrate my arrival at that destination.
Rita, I'm so grateful to connect with you too and thank you so much for reading thus piece and for your thoughtful comments.
I've been very honest about how life has been for me these last few years and that's felt very uncomfortable at times, but as you say, witnessing myself and not allowing shame to live in me any longer is so important to me and my happiness.
I'm so sorry to hear about your friend, that's very sad. We haven't been to that area on the boat yet, but I'd like to.
We bought a motorhome last year too as we wanted to go to places we can't get to on the boat and at 68 and 74, we can't wait around to do things. It's great being able to travel either by boat or motorhome and it's opened life up much more.
It's so great to be in touch; I've just read through your latest piece of writing and saved it. Learning to show myself unconditional love is a practice I'm committed to and I'm hopeful to see change in my relationships ongoing.
I think it’s your authenticity that shines through. You’re just saying what’s in your heart and not trying to prove a point.
I spent some time on a narrow boat in Bath in the mid 90s. It was the first home of one of my best friends from uni. Sadly she passed away very young, just 30.
The simplicity of a mobile lifestyle really appeals to me; in fact I have a motor home on my vision board, with a lady on a laptop looking out onto a stunning beach view! I’d love to work like that….
When I was an early childhood teacher, achieving a ‘sense of belonging’ was always the first thing we focused on with any new children. It just meant sitting beside them, observing their interests and supporting them to follow the thread of them throughout all the activities.
Your piece made me reflect on that. A sense of belonging comes when someone is witnessed for who they are. It sounds like in learning to witness yourself you found your home.
I am a new subscriber. I am fascinated by your lifestyle, as my huband and I watched a series on Brit Box that was a travelog taking place on a narrow boat traversing the canals in England, and fell in love with all of it. We live in the Pacific Northwest of the US, and just really enjoyed immersing ourselves in the show. I'm sure the narrow boat life has its drawbacks, but it looks appealing in our minds.
Hi there and thank you for subscribing! I love living on a narrow boat, although we haven't done a lot of cruising recently as we've also got a motorhome (RV) so we've been travelling in that. We're planning on getting out on the boat over the summer though whilst the weather is good 🌞
We have a couple of things in common, for sure. First, I named my car Grace as you named your boat. When I purchased it I said she'll be my forever car. And by the grace of God, she still is.
As for your writing, I don't have a niche either. I write as I'm inspired and it varies often. I count every subscriber a blessing but huge numbers are not my goal. I just want my words to make a difference.
What a beautiful response to Julie’s question, Karen. The distinction between changing your environment and finding a home within yourself is so powerful. It makes total sense that losing a geographic anchor forced you to build an internal one. Congratulations on your upcoming 5-year anniversary on Grace, and on this incredible surge of new readers who clearly resonated with your authenticity!
Thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful comments. Most weeks, I'm inspired to write by something about what someone else has said or written and I love that. I'm really grateful you're here.
What a beautiful read Karen, on how finding that connection and home within ourselves is the most wonderful experience, and something we are constantly learning to get more close to as life goes by.
Thank you for reading and for your kind comments too Champi 😊
“I’d chosen a different home, but I couldn’t find home within myself” — that’s the line the whole piece turns on. And what strikes me is that losing the geographical anchor wasn’t a detour from the inner work, it was what forced it. As long as there’s an external thing to rearrange, we’ll rearrange it instead of turning inward.
I’ve moved twenty-four times, and for a long stretch I thought each new place would be the one that finally settled me. It took an embarrassing number of those moves to understand that home was never going to arrive in the next postcode — that the unsettled feeling boarded every van with me. The moves weren’t wasted, though. They were the slow lesson that the anchor I kept looking for outside had to be built somewhere I couldn’t pack.
The boat didn’t fail to fix you — it took away the last place left to hide. Five years to find home in your own skin isn’t slow. That’s just how long it takes.🫶🏻
That's so interesting.. thank you for reading and for your thoughtful comments. My whole world started collapsing a couple of years before we sold the house as my mum became ill and died suddenly, but I hadn't thought in terms of when there's something/s external to rearrange, we'll use anything as an avoidance tactic. That's certainly true of me and I called my Substack Saved By Grace as moving onto the boat and everything that came with it is changing my patterns. Grateful for your comments 🤍
I love your writing and this post about looking inward for your ‘home’ is particularly insightful.
You obviously write with honesty and authenticity - I’m so glad that your openness is being rewarded with new readers and subscribers.
That's so kind of you Janine, thank you for your kind and thoughtful comments.
I recognise that ponderment, is the unsteadiness within to do with the flow of nomadic boating? For me moving aboard six years ago one of the appeals was not having to sit still - but when you have to go, it stirs up the reflection doesn't it? Great your story is resonating with people 💚
For me, it's been mostly about not being centred in myself and as I'm being truer to who I am and being less concerned about how I'm perceived by others, I feel much more tethered. I feel much happier living a nomadic life when I feel secure within...if that makes sense!
Yes makes perfect sense. I love the seasonality of boat life, wouldn't change it!
This is lovely! I think for me, feeling untethered is a neurological state, like waking, like sleeping like being calm or being stressed! I guess it's a state of being easily triggered by having no anchor, no internal compass. My last three weeks have required me to navigate being surrounded by people like this. The problem is it's catching. It's a massive act of self mastery to not respond "in kind," but rather, to be kind anyway!
It must take a lot of energy not to respond in kind to those around you and it must be tiring. Thank you so much for reading and for your thoughtful comments.
I feel this has been coming up as a requirement since about 2022! We are all being called to respond differently. I wish you a great enjoyment of your new situation! Water is a medium that fills any gap exactly, effortlessly! 🌟
Hi Alexander, that's something my husband always wanted to do, buy we compromised with a narrow boat. We've recently been to the Outer Hebrides, so I imagine you're seeing some beautiful scenery and landscapes every day. Looking forward to reading about your journey and life on the water!
I also found your Substack through that post, and it feels like providence, there are so many parallels in our journeys despite the differences. I got a little sailing boat named Kismet, and sailed around Scotland.
I so relate to both feeling untethered, but then connecting with myself through the uncertainty. I think in addition to being constantly on the move, there is also a quality to water and nature that connects you with yourself.
Thanks Karen - lovely to see your substack journey and your lovely narrow boat.
Thank you Claire.
Thank you 🤍
I am truly grateful to be here, Karen. Your openness to being inspired by others—and sharing your own truths so authentically—is exactly why so many new readers are finding their way to you!
The journey to finding a place of your own within, no longer contingent on where you happen to be located geographically is a worthwhile trek. I have made the journey and also celebrate my arrival at that destination.
I celebrate it too Peter.
Rita, I'm so grateful to connect with you too and thank you so much for reading thus piece and for your thoughtful comments.
I've been very honest about how life has been for me these last few years and that's felt very uncomfortable at times, but as you say, witnessing myself and not allowing shame to live in me any longer is so important to me and my happiness.
I'm so sorry to hear about your friend, that's very sad. We haven't been to that area on the boat yet, but I'd like to.
We bought a motorhome last year too as we wanted to go to places we can't get to on the boat and at 68 and 74, we can't wait around to do things. It's great being able to travel either by boat or motorhome and it's opened life up much more.
It's so great to be in touch; I've just read through your latest piece of writing and saved it. Learning to show myself unconditional love is a practice I'm committed to and I'm hopeful to see change in my relationships ongoing.
Looking forward to reading more!
Really enjoyed reading this Karen!
I think it’s your authenticity that shines through. You’re just saying what’s in your heart and not trying to prove a point.
I spent some time on a narrow boat in Bath in the mid 90s. It was the first home of one of my best friends from uni. Sadly she passed away very young, just 30.
The simplicity of a mobile lifestyle really appeals to me; in fact I have a motor home on my vision board, with a lady on a laptop looking out onto a stunning beach view! I’d love to work like that….
When I was an early childhood teacher, achieving a ‘sense of belonging’ was always the first thing we focused on with any new children. It just meant sitting beside them, observing their interests and supporting them to follow the thread of them throughout all the activities.
Your piece made me reflect on that. A sense of belonging comes when someone is witnessed for who they are. It sounds like in learning to witness yourself you found your home.
Very happy to connect with you on here!
I am a new subscriber. I am fascinated by your lifestyle, as my huband and I watched a series on Brit Box that was a travelog taking place on a narrow boat traversing the canals in England, and fell in love with all of it. We live in the Pacific Northwest of the US, and just really enjoyed immersing ourselves in the show. I'm sure the narrow boat life has its drawbacks, but it looks appealing in our minds.
Hi there and thank you for subscribing! I love living on a narrow boat, although we haven't done a lot of cruising recently as we've also got a motorhome (RV) so we've been travelling in that. We're planning on getting out on the boat over the summer though whilst the weather is good 🌞
We have a couple of things in common, for sure. First, I named my car Grace as you named your boat. When I purchased it I said she'll be my forever car. And by the grace of God, she still is.
As for your writing, I don't have a niche either. I write as I'm inspired and it varies often. I count every subscriber a blessing but huge numbers are not my goal. I just want my words to make a difference.
Great piece.
Thank you so much and I love that your car is called Grace too 🤍
What a beautiful response to Julie’s question, Karen. The distinction between changing your environment and finding a home within yourself is so powerful. It makes total sense that losing a geographic anchor forced you to build an internal one. Congratulations on your upcoming 5-year anniversary on Grace, and on this incredible surge of new readers who clearly resonated with your authenticity!
Thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful comments. Most weeks, I'm inspired to write by something about what someone else has said or written and I love that. I'm really grateful you're here.